Running Adventures in DC and Accompanying Deep Thoughts

      Currently I write this blog post while I sit in our hotel room during our last night in Baltimore. We've done a bit of hotel jumping during this trip, the past two nights we spent in the heart of DC which led to me indulging in morning runs on the National Mall for the two mornings that I could. (Basically all these boring trips are foundational to get to where I'm going with this). College gives you a lot more independence in general and with that I've had a lot of time to think about who I am as a person and who I want to be. Do I know much about either of those, not really. But I could tell you more about the latter than the former. Back to the DC bit, so morning one I woke up around sunrise to get my run in before going to watch mock trial rounds. I was determined to run down the National Mall and to the White House. Got a bit lost finding the National Mall, instead found the US Botanical Garden, then the National Mall, then got lost trying to find the White House and then eventually found the White House. Morning two went a lot better: Hotel --> National Mall --> White House. 

     One of the reasons I enjoy distance running (or my idea of distance....) is that for me it's time where I am all alone and how far and fast I run is solely dependent upon me and my mindset. I also tend to do a lot of the deep thinking while running. Now to elaborate upon all those, "I'm actually thinking about who I am" thoughts:
       I know precisely what  I want to be when I'm older but have no clue who as a person that is. Sure I have my morals and values and beliefs set in place but the emotional/personal side of me is where I have no idea who or what I am. The superficial: What one sort of style do I like? What sort of music is my main choice? Even trying to answer those I just feel all over the place. The deeper complexes in my mind: According to the Myers-Briggs test, I am very strongly a 'T' for thinking over a 'F' for feelings. Which I'm actually pretty proud of, I like the idea of being seen as unemotional and rational. I don't like the idea of being perceived as being dominated and controlled by my feelings. Nor do I typically like to display any form of them. But then I worry that despite what I want to be and want to be seen as, what I portray is the exact opposite. When I acknowledge feelings/emotions/whatever you want to call them, I get scared that those affect me too much and I let it show and then lose all appearances of not being that. Going with that (in a way), reaching emotional connections with people terrifies me. I find it hard to believe in people on personal levels, which admittedly probably has to do with the fact that I tend to chose to believe in the wrong people. The couple mantras that have been running through my head for the past week are as follows:
     1. I don't know that I believe in people but I believe in myself and that's all I'll ever need. 

     2. There was an Aztec song we read for my American Literature class and the line that has been stuck with me is, "If it is jade, it shatters." I'm not sure how many things last, they all tend to break and shatter at some point since every little piece of life is so fragile.

      So for anyone who does read all of my  self-reflective, I have no idea what I'm doing, sleep-deprived, exhausted thoughts: This one of the more personal posts I've had in a long time. With the growing and searching and discovering I've done thus far in college, I've become a lot more comfortable with myself even if I don't know who that is.  I am who I am and I'm over letting other people's thoughts of me influence who I try to be. 

And another, I feel it's necessary disclaimer: The tone of this blog entry definitely makes me sound like a really sad person all the time. But I don't mean it in that way at all, merely that I've been more reflective than usual as of lately. Quite honestly, I am a really happy-go-lucky person. If you don't believe me, ask anyone staying in hotels with me this morning how excited I get for breakfast in the early morning :)

To go with the story of my running experiences in DC pictures are posted below:

This was the, well I'm lost in the Botanical Garden, that is a really nice fountain/statue combination. I'll document that and take a picture.

I could see the Capitol Building from the Botanical Garden and seeing it helped me to navigate where the National Mall was relative to where I had been. So here's the Capitol Building at sunrise!

This was along my National Mall portion of the run: the Smithsonian Castle. Such a gorgeous building, as much of DC is. I wish I had more time here to see everything!

Washington Monument, at one end of the National Mall. I never got to the Lincoln Memorial which I had hoped to do. The Lincoln Memorial and Washington Monument with the massive reflecting pool in the middle remind me of Booth and Bones sitting at the Lincoln sometimes at the end of the day. As a very devoted Bones fan, I have an additional appreciation for both.

This was my final success. So I was still some distance from the White House, but I really don't care that much. I was able to see it after all.

(This is still Day 1 morning run). This is the National Museum of Natural History. Probably my favorite building on the National Mall. Actually walked around inside the day before and was amazed. Made some effort at an impromptu meeting with Douglas Ubelaker, yep, didn't work. Worth a shot though, next time I'm in town! Which I really wouldn't mind spending a few months here, future internship?

Day 2 it was much easier to find the White House, I actually knew where I was going and all. And I was fortunate enough to get my picture taken in front of it! Woo!